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Saturday, October 25th, 2003

Time:12:00 am.
Mood:not too cheery, but thirsty.
today i woke up a six o'clock to drive to school. it was horrible. once i move out i can leave a bunch of minutes later. that is a good thing. i have to work in piscataway tomorrow. a place 54 miles from my house. it should be gay. i have to pay insurance though. that is good that i can do that. i never thought that i could be lonely, did you know that juan? i don't like people. i like my buddies. i like my crew. they were fun. i just don't want to be surrounded by them. it is intimidating. it makes me want to do bad things. to you juan. i want to rock. rocking is not bad. rocking is good. if i can get my work done tomorrow, this weekend could be very nice and stress free. that is what i need. i haven't really had any of that all week. i have been alone all week. i don't like that. not one bit. but i am sick too. i don't want to get anyone sick.

today i was very sick. my stomache and throat and head hurt. i laid down to sleep for an hour or so and when my mom woke me up i thought that it was tomorrow. i don't know, fucked up shit happens in your sleep. i've learned about it in school. i have also learned that if i keep going to school i will not live much longer at all. which is really a shame isn't it. i mean all that i contribute to society. how nice i am to people. how much i care about other's feelings. how wonderful i make everyone feel. how attractive i am. this is all sarcasm juan.

i want to be in a kickin band that rules the world. then i can have a crew again. a posse. we have a show for the town battle of the bands in january. we have to play it and not be rusty. everyone will want to score with me again. i will feel cool for the night. i will go home and sleep easy knowing that i have given the gift of rock. that is all i want to do. just rock. that's all. not anything more. i don't need the drugs. i don't need the sex. i don't even need the roll. i just need to rock. david bowie fucking rocks. and he slept with mick jagger. i will not do that. but i'd like to rock like mr. bowie. this monday after work i will do school things then take the night to change strings, set up, and prepare for battle, my tools of rock. those are my guitars. they rock. i want to go to bed because i have to get up in a few hours. big v is still partying. in the city. at party city. so i'll wait. i'll practice good oral. hygene. and brush my teeth. it will be nice to feel nice in the teeth.

you can't rock unless you are attractive to sluts and have great, aryan white teeth. i'll do those things and rock. keep your pants on sluts. keep your sunglasses on sluts who are looking at my teeth. they will blind you soon. you should be blind already. from being hit in the eye with so much wang (cough cough sarah cough cough). keep your pants on too. how about everyone keeps their pants on. that sounds like a plan. i believe a man from a particular state once realized what a great thing pants are. it was probably a jewish state. if you don't get it. pipe it. then you are not rock and roll. then you are jewish. you like yanni. yanni is greek. then chances areyou like fried goat. if you are greek you may be related to adam moutafish. he can be in my rock band. we can rock. he needs to rock. so he does not make any more slime. no more floors or slime or floors made out of slime. just rock. i'm out. in the bathroom. with minty gel in my mouth. stay metal. or if you are a zombie, stay dead. bitch.
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Thursday, October 23rd, 2003

Subject:juan pierre's fantastic baserunning ability
Time:9:46 pm.
i'm not a fan of the florida marlins. but i hate the yankees. however, i have underestimated the marlins. perhaps they still stand no change againg the powerful A.L lineups, but they do play smallball rather well. they stretch out singles to doubles, are smart on the basepaths, and play to their field exremely well. all the makings of an old school team. it's a shame that they aer all small and not on steroids because they cannot win now.

today i went with rola to her muslamb meeting (note the gwb pronouncing of the word), pretty much because i'm despertate for human interaction and rola is one human being that i do know who goes to my college. i don't want to meet new ones, they are all not for me. i really do wish i could though. i rationalize not meeting people by calling them all douchebags, but i really do like people. they are not bad. they just don't like me because i am ugly. i got a letter today. i got two letter actually. one is a recall on my car. they say the air conditioning is going to break. just great. the other was from philosophers. time to pick classes. i'd like to be a philosopher. but i have to support a family eventually so i can't do that. i must do a profiting thing for me and the ol' lady. like selling crack. my van has one more week before it MUST be off the street. i got that letter today too. i guess i got three letters. i lied to you pablo. i am so tired of being alone all the time, i need something other than writing stupid college papers to occupy my time. i really hate college. every time i think of it i just want to end my life in some horrible way just so that i have one last bit of suffering to endure to justify offing myself to avoid other stupid pains.

my mom gave me a fire safety packet today. it has a ruler. it has an eraser. it has a pencil. i ate a hamsteak today. i am so fucking fat and worthless. why am i even here, just so that god can look down and all the other "good people" can gawk at how akward looking i am and make fun of me in heaven, a place i will never go, while people down here avoid my busted ass at all costs. ahhh, i fucking hate living. i just want to go outside but it's too cold to sleep outside tonight. adam called. said that we should go to cabin j. that would be great. i like cabin j. it is good. me and the big v could be in the woods. that's where i like to be. i like the idea of saving money to buy a big house. that makes me feel like i've got something to work for. but i'd rather drop out of school and work three jobs. that would be silly and fun. i just want to be happy again. i'd like to try to find a buddy or a person who i can talk to for a while.

i think doing stage productions of twilight zone episodes is a good idea. i've always wanted to be an actor, i don't really mention it because everyone will think i'm gay and i've never met a character who i'd like to be. but i know a few people i'd like to be for about 22 minutes. everything could be low budget, the dialouge would carry it along. i could do it, i even know how to get permission and rights from the TZ people. it would be fun. it's a dream though. and i've had lots of them. so many. they don't generally come true. other things interfere with them, like living sometimes.

tomorrow is my early day at school. i wake up at 6 and drive to nigga university. i drive and the sun doesn't come up until i'm a few towns over. at first i thought it was novel. but now it just hurts me like lots of other things. i don't care though. no one does anymore. everyone is tired of me. my mom is. i'm sure big v is. i'm sure god is. there's just no more place for someone who feels like me. there is only one thing to do and i'm going to go do it now. i'm going to go drink some orange juice. because my throat hurts. i'm going to go. because i hate my life and i want to stop wrting a lot of things. it comes out funny sometimes. beavis once said "life sucks. and then you die." he couldn't be more of a prophet. scott thompson once said "peace doesn't make a profit" and dave foley (dressed as a french canadian female hooker) said "not unless it's a piece of ass."

that's the end of my story. life sucks then you die then you find peace which doesn't make you any money so you become a cross dressing french canadian hooker. thank you tv.
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Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003

Subject:dave jadiski, man this cat can swing. he weighs almost 50 pounds and he delivers my paper on time
Time:8:12 pm.
i am about to do some work for freshman seminar class in college. it is not a bad class. it is just at a bad time. i want to do something that i'm good at. i want to play some badminton. i want to die. i really really do. everyday i wake up and go through the same stupid bullshit and want to die. why can't i just get what i want once. i'm not asking for a fucking pony or anything.

i have a ten dollar gift certificate to barnes and nobles booksellers. i will go there eventually and buy something worth ten dollars. i have a flu like cold. it is gay. today i saw the big v. for about several minutes. i then proceeded to eat breakfast at the diner. i then went home and was useless for a few hours. i showered again, just to clean out my illness. it's not working. it seems everyday there are more and more papers to write. it is stupid. i wish that i wasn't so pressured to know what i have to do for the rest of my life. i'm still young. i am in college because it's free, i have no idea why i stay. i do not want to pick a career, i don't know how it will come to me.

my cat is trying to eat pretzels. she does not like them. i do not like me. i am going to go do things now. hopefully there will be a huge pile of heroin somewhere that i can do and die. good evening.
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Tuesday, October 21st, 2003

Time:10:30 pm.
Mood:robert smith (beyond suicidal).
i have to write a five page paper. it is due tomorrow. i don't have the will to live, so fuck writing a paper. i have the flu. perhaps i'll get aids and die. i have been working on my paper for four hours and have only typed the title. it is called "it's fun to play with plato." i'm going to change that too. i want nothing more than to just die and rest in eternal peace, no more hassles. with my luck i'll be reincarnated as a fucking person again and have to kill myself over and over again until someone getst the message. i've changed a whole lot. i don't even watch porn any more. sex is disgusting. so are you ballsacface. i no longer care about winning at anything. i only play my guitar a few minutes a day. i gained most the weight that i lost back over the past year. i drink too much orange juice, my hands smell like oranges. i am going to be working a lot this week, which means i will have to balance that and schoolwork. i hate school.

been listening to jamiroquai lately. wanting to dance. i have nowhere to dance. dancing is gay. so are you ballsacface. the paper i have to write is going to take me a few hours to do, but it is hot in this room. i don't like being warm. i do not like you ballsacface. adam spratt called me today, wanted to hang out. i couldn't because all this work. i did not go to my philosophy department meeting today because i felt like death. not that i mind dying, but dying at a meeting full of old men in ties is almost as gay as being killed by eric hanston in a head on collision on weldon road.

today i watched a twilight zone video. it had very good episodes on it. my mom made me soup because i am sick. and just in case there is a certain party reading this journal, MY MOM DID INDEED PUT AN ICE CUBE IN THE SOUP BECAUSE IT WAS A BIT TOO HOT TO EAT RIGHT AWAY. if youdon't understand that, well then chances have it that you're not ray charles. chances will also have it that you didn't get that because you are not used to hearing about the ice cubes in soup theory. do not concern yourself with ice cubes in soup if it is not your place. however, if it is your place, please put them in my bowl when the soup is hot.

my cat is laying on me. he is making me warm. he is furry. he is black. he is furry and black and his name is carlos mendelbaum. he is spanish and jewish. like geraldo. we make up ethnicites of our cats because it's fun. you are not fun ballsacface. my brother has filled the room up with wood because he's building something. there is a lot of wood in here. wood is good when you live in the hood.

i'm going to go write a paper then go to bed and pray to die in a way that is not too publicly expoited. then perhaps i will die in that way. who knows what's in the cards. ron howard knows what's in the cards. fuck you ron howard. you are bald. fucking ballsacface. i'd like to go now. if you are willing to kill me and would like to make a decent amount of cash, and it will be cash. please give me a call at 9738861852 all suggestions will be heard. thank you
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Monday, October 20th, 2003

Subject:reforms in local and state government
Time:6:28 pm.
Mood:get ahome.
today i watched a twilight zone video and ate some toffee and wanted to die. nobody was home, i was alone. it was not fun. i want to move to the woods. i can die there too and nobody will ever hear about it except for a few persons who i will not know enough to have them care. that will be sweet. i showered today, for the first time in a while and i feel much more unclear than i did before. i feel guilty for some reason. for showering. very odd. i have papers and midterms. i have to do them now. if something killed me now, i wouldn't have to do them. that would be glorious. vicki went to north carolina today. sounds like fun. north carolina has fun things. my uncle lives there. haven't heard from him in a while. whatever.

i'm going to change my major this week from philosophy to something else. i don't know what. perhaps to suicide. i'd be really good at that. i have to go to sleep but if i lay down, i'll be out for the night and i have two papers to type tonight for tomorrow's class. fuck school. if you are in high school, don't go to college. it is gay. think about it. you will be 22 when you graduate college. you will have spent 17 of those years in school. that blows.

i watched a bunch of any milonakis videos. he's kind of funny. my dad gave me 20 dollars for gas because of my birthday. that was nice i suppose. i saw a movie with steph duncan and big v this weekend. they wanted to slam me. i didn't let them. eric hanston almost killed me on weldon road when he was trying to pass on a double yellow line. fucking dumbass. i mean i want to die really badly and all, but it just takes away from it if i were killed by eric hanston. it would make me want to die when i was dead.

i hate school. there are so many black people and rich white people there. too many of them. i want to hang myself from a tree outside one of the important buildings just to show everyone how badly school sucks. i need some money so i don't have to worry about that. because worrying makes your penis shrink. i only have about 2 inches left before it's all gone. between worrying and gambling there is not much left.

i told some skater kids with skateboards to get a home today. the one flipped me off. so i stopped in the middle of the road. i told him once again to get a home. punk ass kid. that is all i ever do now, want to die and tell kids to get homes. very fulfilling. i have to go type now. $400 if you make it look like an accident.
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Friday, October 17th, 2003

Subject:ballsac keeps falling on my head. that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turning red.
Time:12:29 pm.
Mood: at ballsac.
i just got home from school. school makes me want to kill myself. i had to take midterms. midterms make me want to kill myself. i filled up my gas tank. filling up my gas tank makes me want to drive less. i ate a piece of enteman's ultimate crumb cake. i can tell you one thing. it is not ultimate. i've had the ultimate. it is not enteman's. entaman's is not ultimate at all. big v special in a small baking tin is ultimate. especially wehen warm. fuck you entamans. i am on the phone wtih my lawyer. i am going to sue the enteman's company for false advertisement. hopefully we can reach an out-of-court settlement where i get 12,000 marshmallow iced devil's food cakes. and don't try to sneak in any of those "light" ones either mr. enteman, you cocksmoking samuri. i can tell, so bring the calories.

a telephone survey man called me just now. i answered him honestly and politely. i said that i did not favor president bush. i said that i was protestant. i said that i do support meat sticks. actually that was not a question. just a meat stick.
i think that i'm gonna get some pepperoni bread today for me and big v. i would get one, but vicki doesn't share because she is not a proper sharing person and she likes to take toys away from kids so that she will have all the toys and never share. that is what she does.

i may get to go to prom with hillairy. it will be down south. that is funny because i can go WHOOO!!!! and everyone will think that i am from there. because if you live in the south you go WHOOOOOO all the time. if i go to prom with her though, there will be no cabin j. which sucks because cabin j does not suck. i have to go now, i am very hungry. if i were a prostitute, i'd want to be paid in chicken nuggets right now. i'm going to possibly go get chicken nuggets.
see you later octavio
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Thursday, October 16th, 2003

Time:8:05 pm.
Mood:your mom.
today i drove home from school. i hate school it makes me want to slit my wrists wtih rusty old guitar strings from 1987. came home and ate a decent sandwitch then came in here and tried to study. however, i just can't do it, i can't bring myself to give a shit about school or anything of that nature. so i went out to do somehting, i don't even remember what, oh i think it was buy toilet paper. anyway, i drove by the park and there were a bunch of 11 year old kids playing basketball, smoking things and wearing tyra banks naked hoodies and t-shirts, i think they were playing a tyrabanksnaked shirts v. tyrabanksnaked hoodies game or some shit. all in all there were six band clothing items on these ten year old scrappy basketball players. i honked. they looked confused. i have no van. therefore nobody recognizes me. i have to get rid of the van before monday or else the LS snow ordinance kicks in and i'll get fined for having it on the street. so if anyone wants it cheap, please take it,i really need the money.

phish tickets go on sale tomorrow morning
maybe i will try to get tickets, but i don't know what one i'd actually be able to go to. who cares, i'll just sit home. who's ready for saturday night? not me.
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Wednesday, October 15th, 2003

Time:12:05 am.
Mood: stressed.
this time last year i had two jobs. now i have nothing. this time last year i had my van. now i do not. this time last year i had a functioning band. now i do not. this time last year i did not want to die as much as i do now. this time last year i thought i was respected for all my hard work. now i know better, i know it's all for shit. this time last year i didn't have ulcers. now i do and they hurt a whole shitload. perhaps i'll feel better one day, but that day is not soon. so who's up for saturday night? so who actually reads this? so who wants to try to get phish tickets for me on friday while i have my midterms, you can use my credit card for whatever you need if you get them. i'm not feeling to dandy tonight. tonight vicki asked me if i had anyone i could call or ask if i missed my classes tomorrow. i then realized that in a school of around ten thousand kids, i don't have one person i talk to, not one. so i wanted to die. i was then told in more or less words that i'm not even the equivalent of a human being. so i'm just waiting to die. i hope i don't have to wait long. i have nothing to leave anyone, and if you think you are getting my es-5, that goes to the winner of the post-death arm wrestling tournament. i hate it when i just sit here and stay awake but my eyes start to crust over and close because i'm tired. fuck this useless body i'm in, when i die maybe some bacteria will eat my flesh and i'll be listed as not such a fat fuck on my death certificate. goodnight raul.
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Saturday, October 4th, 2003

Subject:tonight i went to michael getchis' house. it was ok. i didn't blow anything up but i got to hang ou
Time:12:07 am.
Mood:tired ted.
tonight i went to michael getchis' house. it was ok. i didn't blow anything up but i got to hang out with xuxa. he is a funny asian kid. we talked about the braves and then they lost (i think, some obnoxious fucks were blasting emimem garbage and standing in front of the tv in the bottom of the ninth). my beard has gotten much longer since the last time anyone has seen me. everyone likes my beard because it is long. the same reason everyone likes my penis. i wish it wasn't so cold so we could all go for a sacman stroll. but halloween is coming up. my favorite time of year. every year i get this giddy exciting feeling with all the change in weather and shit, just like everything is great. because halloween usually is. i can get up in drag and have fun. i can see rocky horror. i can trick or treat. i can curl my eyelashes. i can bring roy mcallister to life. go roy, heavyweight champion of the world
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Wednesday, June 25th, 2003

Time:9:02 pm.
Mood: worried.
so i went to william paterson's freshman orientation today and it was killing me. first, we had some motherfuker from monster.com come in and slip a shitload of advertisements for mentos and whatnot into his speech about "how to be succesful." so on the feedback sheet i attached a drawing in which this corporate tool's head is being kicked off by XuXa, i don't know if he'll get the message but i'm sure that someone will. anyway, i found out that they are not giving us our schedules until tomorrow so i found my mom and left hoping that big v would not have left for six flags just yet and then i could go with her but she was gone when i called. since there was nothing to do i went to the pizza place across from my old house in haledon with my mom, pretty fucking cool eh? i got home and nobody called at all, no one. i had my house phone and cell phone right next to me the whole time but nobody called me at all, so i slept for a few hours, woke up called vicki went back to sleep. phone went out of service, so i just turned it on again, still no calls. fuck this, i'm going out for a while.
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Sunday, March 23rd, 2003

Time:9:06 pm.

Which Donnie Darko character are you? by Shay</font>
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Monday, February 10th, 2003

Subject:death of an icon: the record release hype
Time:11:48 pm.
Mood: mellow.
given i am one of those guilty parties that complained about cd prices and how useless cd's were, i look back with only fond memories of my small silver friend. but the cd is not the only form of recorded media that i will miss, it is all tangible forms that are up for purchase at record stores, it sucks to see them all go.
kids my age, just think. do you remember the days of cutting school one day because you just had to be the first person to get the new Bush cd, even though there were 349889 copies at the store? i'm sure the same applies to the older generation with their Frampton Comes Alive records. Or do you remember just being a dollar or two short on the new Soundgarden release and having to go to the tape wall to make a purchase? well i sure as fuck do and i miss those days. not just because they were the days of my "care-free youth," but because with the death of all recording media comes the death of a large part of our past. Tapes were a sensible form of evolution from the vinyl record, more portable and, well, more portable. then came the cd, which ended an era of vinyl (although i still fight to get as much stuff on vinyl as possible). None of these forms of media truly made any others obseletee, but this whole technological revolution bullshit kills everything.
on the day the new phish, bon jovi, whoever the fuck you want to insert here's cd comes out, only about 12 loyal fans go to record stores to buy the cd. i call this a fucking disgusting disrespect to the tradition on american rock and roll(ironically, most people fit bon jovi uner that same definition). My point is, the hype is gone. Whitey McWhite in the third grade will go to school on the tuesday that his hero, eminem's, new cd comes out. he'll dick around with his friends and come home to masturbate and take a shit. then he'll bullshit some more on AOL instant messenger and eventually load up kazzaa and download the entire new (albeit shitty) album off kazzaa and go eat some potato chips. fucking tool.
not that i'm not all for mp3 trade, i mean, the bootlegging community has thrived as a result of napster and kazzaa, but seriously their legacy is more detramental to the american rock scene than anything else. once again, i am guilty of downloading songs and not owning the album, i am probably downloading some song right now as i write this. But my point is that if there is a cd that i feel rocks fucking hard as hell, i'll be the first one to cut school on tuesday when it comes out. And you can bet your sweet little half filipino, half nigerian ass that i'll be the first one to be standing outside the record store as the 34 year old loser/burnout opens the gates, allowing me to hold in my hand, 60 minutes of rock and roll joy.
the hype is everywhere, at shows and signings, on tv and the radio, on the internet, wherever the fuck there are 14 year old chicks. but once we cut the hype out of record release dates, we kill a piece of rock music, and all music for that matter. please shell out the cash and save my childhood
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Thursday, January 30th, 2003

Time:8:27 pm.
Mood: accomplished.
it's 8 twenty something and i think that i was supposed to do something tonight. i can't really remember what it was, but i'm sure someone will yell at me and remind me, because everyone i know is a fucking nutbag. those crazy white people. anyway, midterm tests are over which is kind of cool, but it sucks that i have to stay all day in school, oh well. today i got a letter from the dean of philosophy at drew university in the ol' mailbox. he said that my writing was cool or something and that if i ever wanted to stop by his office and talk philosophy with him, he was game. now i figure that this is the generic letter they send to all applicants of the philosopy program and they don't generally expect a response, but how funny would it be if i went to his office and did talk to him. he'd think i'm some faygo dork kind of guy.
the front page of the daily news has two bright color pictures today. one of which is mr. saddam as the jew media portrays him (a badass with a burt reynolds moustace and a fat cuban cigar). the picture below his, of equal size and clarity is one of a woman in bondage. apparently some chick on a tv show used to do bondage films to pay her way through college. i think it's cool and funny that they had that on the front page with all of the pro war bullshit, but i'm not falling for the scam. they think that by putting a picture of a blonde chick in bondage, everyone will want to kill arabs and go to war. don't ask me how, they just expect it.
this brings me to my next conspiracy theory. this conspiracy is taking place in our own backyard, in our school. now i don't mean to sound like andy spratt here, but the government is brainwashing young students using cheap a iced tea beverage known as "arctic splash." you see, all of the major coca-cola brand beverages have been raised in price to $1.25 a bottle, when all of the sudden a small, independent ice tea appears at a friendly price of $.75. now normally i wouldn't think anything of it, but with the lack of enlistment in the united states armed forces and the panic it causes leads me to believe the military is behind this. they know that high school kids are cheap as fuck, and if they see a drink of lower quality for $.50 cheaper, they will jump on it like super mario on a mushroom. don't get me wrong now, the drink is a gigantic piece of shit, i'm embarrassed to say that i have tried one (but i didn't inhale)but i now realize what is in this drink. the united states military has laced this beverage with a brainwashing drug that will numb the minds of the american youth and convert them into war-hungry republicans, thus making them want to enlist in the armed service. however, i am too fucking smart to fall for this facist ice tea brainwashing regime's evil scam. i have seen good kids go down already, so if you actually do read this please do not drink arctic splash ice tea. by the time you realize what has happened, you will be grasping your side because you've been shot by an iraqi soldier. so if you care at all, please don't drink arctic splash ice tea. i'll give you the extra fifty cents if you need it. i'll see you later my comrades.
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Monday, January 27th, 2003

Subject:ahh xuxa
Time:5:50 pm.
Mood:ghetto superstar.
today is monday, a day that generally tips to the shitter end of the day spectrum, not that there really is one. however, today i have come to a few realizations that have brightened what would be a generally shitty monday. realization one: i can curl my moustache into a handlebar moustache, thus making me cooler, sexier, more jacked and more hung than i already am. actually, that was the only realization that i came to that made my dreary day brighter, but isn't that one fucking crazy thing to realize? how many people (not counting the french because they are not real people) actually have a handlebar moustache? not that i'm actually going to make it my new style, but it's always cool to know that i can do something that none of you can so, pipe.
my band is in dire need of a website, and not one with child porn on it. every shitty band from here to compton has a gay website so i want ours to be different and better. i'd like for the site to be called godmademefunky.com, that would be pretty damn sweet. the only thing is i have no idea how to make a website so antything some stranger could get up for us would do. this is the case for both Tyra Banks Naked, and my even bigger sell-out project: The Asian Quarterback (p.s look for the AQ LP to be out soon, it's 18 songs of pure ghetto freestyle straight outta j town). god i hate myself for just typing that. but seriously, if you or someone you know can make a kick ass website for us, just shout me a holla. i don't want a shitty website though, only kick ass shite must go on it and you have to do it for free because we don't have a shitload of money like other shitty metal bands who have houses that were built just for them to practice in. oh yeah, and if you think from that previous statement that we are a shitty metal band, go to hell before i throw granola at you and hug a tree. let's see, what the hell did i do today? i got to school late and my smart people ingles teacher thought that i was trippin off my ass, i went to some classes, had some 14 year old chicks hit on me, the usual. got home and gelled up my handlebar stache and that's about it. in a second i have to run over to ritchie's music and pick up a new footswitch for the ol' marshall stack so that i can continue to make great music that all of the north jersey hippies just chew up. oh yeah, if you go to gwbush.com, there is a video clip of our supreme court appointed commandess in chief picking his nose. it's funny. especially because he snorts coke. hahaha. see, i'm laughing. xuxa and i learned how to say some more stuff in asian today, that is funny too. now i know why all of these fourteen year old chicks find me so attractive, i'm funny, built, witty and clever, have dreamy eyes, a package to die for, soulful voice and i can SPEAK ASIAN. damn i rule a whole lot. well anyway, i have to seriously go think about starting to contemplate about whether or not to consider going out to go get that pedal. so i'll see you later all of my non-existant fans.
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Friday, January 24th, 2003

Subject:wan yan, newo ma?
Time:7:35 pm.
Mood: giggly.
i pose a question to the american public tonight. is there anyone who thinks that jerry seinfeld is a stupid unfunny asshole?? seriously, i know that the whole concept of his show is that it isn't about anything in particular, but come on, adam xuxa and i do shit that is funnier than seinfeld on a daily basis and i don't see any network (other than asian ones) offering us a chance at a sitcom. sorry to all you seinfeld fans. i feel bad for you, no really, i do. how could you be entertained by that shit, i just watched two seconds of his show and i almost shit out my entire colon. he was onstage talking about dinner rolls. Dinner rolls are not funny. Bread is not funny. Anything in that whole bread food group is not funny. And you are not funny mr. seinfeld. If i ever have the privilage to meet jerry seinfeld, i'll glady give him the Bill Buckner (that is the act of cutting of a man's testicles then rolling them through his legs, for those of you who aren't as cool and informed as i am).
you know what's funny, a bunch of people still look at this journal, in fact adam spratt commented on how large my penis was int the comment section. sarah did too, but just in different words, crazy white kids. It is officially one month until the big huge phish concert at continental airlines arena and i'm still the only person in the tri-state area that has a ticket. it's cool i think, but i don't want it to turn out to be the same situation as the allman brothers show i saw this summer. the scene was pretty much me and a bunch of washed up 40-50 something hippies laying back on the grass trying to hear the songs over the conversations of 5000 chatty college kids talking on their cell phones waiting to hear "ramblin' man" so that they tell all of their fraternity borhters. Damn, if i ever get that lame when i'm in college, i want someone to shoot me and/or give me a brown glove. I know it sounds harsh, but pipe, it's completely appropriate.
in other news, school midterms started today and i did rather poorly as i tried to regurgitate information that was mostly presented in the first few weeks of school. fuck it man i have my shit together anyway. i mean, i can be the president in 17 years. does it sound far fetched? i think not. this is how i see it:
i have a 1280 on my SAT's, Ben Ernst, i mean george bush only had a 1206, so i'm cool there. now that the numbers are there, i figure i have the next 17 years to run three businesses into the ground like he did before his dad's money enabled him to buy a share of the texas rangers and trade sammy sosa. 17 years is a plenty good amount of time to run a few buisnesses into the ground and make bad descisions about a sport i know nothing about. Now that all that criteria is met, or will be met in the near future, all i have to do is go out, buy some guns (no,the two on my arms don't count) and hate some black people and all other ethnic groups. by that time, i'll be elected into office by the white trash majority of the country and i can kill people for sport, especially the innocent. Damn our president sucks, it sucks that he'll get re-elected because the sappy bullshit about november 11th. fucking people. how funny would it be if he got busted for having child porn on the white house computer? i know it's random but why not check, it would be funny either way.
It's about 8 pm EST time now, i'm hoping to get out in a little bit, i'm hanging around listenting to phish and complaining to no one about the president, no good can come out of this. The Buddy Guy show in dover is coming up quick and i intend on getting tickets, if anyone is interested, shout me a holla. tickets are like 35 but it's so worth it. worst comes to worst, i'll go alone again, like i have to go to everything ever that i like. XuXa is talking to me now so i'm a signing off for a while. later.
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Monday, January 20th, 2003

Subject:Someone stepped on my headphones Al
Time:9:36 pm.
Mood: sick.
Yeah, i went to fire up the ol' recorder and go to work when i realized that my shite hath been violated. i went to go pick up my headphones and they are now snapped in half thanks to a clumsy, tall, gooffy, lanky white little brother. What can you do though, it looks like those asian kids in the headphone sweatshops will just have to work a little bit harder to satisfy my big fat american electronic needs. actually, it didn't really matter because i had an extra pair of ghetto headphones that worked just fine for me so i actually got shit done. i recorded most of the parts to opium dream, and it sounded overwhelmingly decent. none of the parts are taht involved so i didn't need to call my drummer to do shit, which is cool (i'd much rather say that i played all the parts rather than having to credit only one other musician). The song probably isn't one that's going anywhere, or that i'm even going to use, for that matter. Yet, it is kind of catchy so i figure taht i'll record it just in case someone out there is interested in jamhippiefolk stuff that i put out.
it's kind of odd that i'm writing on this journal thing, i mean i haven't updated in nearly a year i think. i was going to go visit vicki at work but then i realized that she'd be getting off in a bit so i figured, why not surprise all of my fans that come onto live journal everyday of the week just in hopes of seeing my page updated. Well, i guess today is your lucky day you pathetic loser, even my vicki doesn't check my page every day because she knows better. oh well, i guess i'm just that damn attractive, talented and hung.
we had a show in march, however, the date has now been changed to april 11th 2003. the songs are going to be better, the band will be louder, and we'll have an even bigger capitalist display at our merch table for all of our "target audiece" to purchase. vicki is going to have to work extra hard and make all the shite because hillairy is moving, i'd help if they wanted too but shh... don't say anything just yet, i'll let it all be a surpirise.
Eh, i tire of writing online. vicki just signed on so i'd rather talk to her. besides, if you are reading this or have gotten this far, chances are that you ARE vicki anyway. so i'll see you all at another time. goodnight.
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Monday, December 10th, 2001

Time:4:40 pm.
Mood: accomplished.
yay i made your journal pretty! yea this is jana by the way. i got you some friends too. im cool!
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LiveJournal for Ted.

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